Let’s Talk About Post Menopausal Hair
Can we talk about shampooing our hair? As in, how many times a week do you do it?
For me, it depends on how many activities I have planned. If, say, I have mah jong on Tuesday, then I’m meeting friends for lunch on Wednesday, and then going to trivia on Thursday night, each day gets a shampooing, a blow-drying, and a flat-ironing.
If I have nothing going on, I’ll wash my hair on Saturday night (because we always eat out then) and then not wash it until… I… do. It could be several days. Is that gross?
I can personally deal with Day 2 of unwashed hair by telling myself it’s good to skip a shampoo occasionally - at least that’s what the influencers are telling us, and they always tell the truth, right? But Days 3 through 4? 5? 6? (What’s my record??) of unwashed hair means it goes in a high ponytail because my hair is stupid and unruly after being slept on, plus my head sweats heavily, menopause-style, each night, and I can’t stand the long, heavy, sweat- and product-laden feel of it around my face. If I let it hang loose, it looks like a ratty, dirty nest and nothing will tame it.
I’ve tried dry shampoo, blasting it into my hair, which, according to the can, is supposed to absorb oil and help you “extend a blowout.” I assume this is referring to a stylist’s work on my hair, rather than the half-assed thing I do to myself. Dry shampoo rarely…okay, never, works for me because there’s only so much powder in a can can do, you know?
Also also, ALSO, I am thoroughly tired of my hair. When I do wash it and try to style it, I get so frustrated with its general crappiness and the stupid cowlicks around my face that make my bangs go BOING and pop up no matter how much I try to tame them. I’m embarrassingly going to admit that I regularly wack at them with manicure scissors. Gee. I bet you never noticed.
Even more embarrassing, I don’t have a stylist. For the last year in an effort to save money for a pool (I’m willing to walk around with shitty hair, THAT’S how much I want a pool) I’ve been slapping a boxed root touch up and toner on my hair at home and skipping cuts. Gee, can you tell? So the fact that my hair looks like shit is on me. I’ll own it.
So anyway, how many times a week do you wash your hair?
Ahhhhhhhh…the good old days! This is around 1997, when my hair was kind of a delight.