Stay True To Who You Are
I grew up in a small town in western Pennsylvania - Vandergrift, PA. It is a no-frills, middle-class, blue-collar town where life always ran in a familiar rhythm.
Back in the day, our parents left the doors unlocked, we roamed through town all day on our bikes, and didn’t come home until dinner. Everyone knew your parents and grandparents, and most people weren’t pretending to be something they were not because we were all pretty much the same - people who lived in old-ish houses who walked to school and to the corner market and had parents who worked at the steel mill.
It was a simple, steady existence. Nothing fancy or pretentious, just ordinary people living ordinary lives and being perfectly fine with that.
These days, I live in a small town in Florida that’s sometimes referred to as “the bubble.” It’s a beautiful town and a carefully planned world where everything is tidy and a bit insulated from real life. Here, we ride around on golf carts, shop at boutiques, and lunch on smoothie bowls. Everything is polished, landscaped, and perfected. It’s pleasant in its own way, but it couldn’t be more different from my hometown.
For instance, in Vandergrift, weekends meant heading to a church or fire hall fish fry, or ordering chicken wings at our favorite bar, where we’d chat with neighbors and old friends. Nobody cared about $12 avocado toast because the $6 breakfast sandwich (English muffin, eggs, cheese, sausage or bacon, lettuce, and tomato) at the town’s restaurant was the thing we all craved on a weekend morning. Here in Florida, brunch comes with a hefty bill and fancy menu items, you meet up with your friends at wine tastings, and everyone seems to have a curated life that looks like affluence and pricey handbags.
There’s nothing wrong with any of that. I know because I straddle both worlds. I still put French fries on my salad and sandwiches, I occasionally say “yinz,” and I can make homemade pierogies and haluski like any other girl who grew up in Western Pennsylvania. But I also meet friends for yoga class, have a few favorite boutiques, done my share of med-spa treatments, and invested in a somewhat pricey purse not long ago.
My towns—the past and the present—feel like two completely different worlds, and sometimes I’m not sure I fully belong in either. I’m too small-town and blue-collar for the bubble, and when I go back home, I feel a little too shaped by that bubble for the old neighborhood.
It’s like Reese Witherspoon in Sweet Home Alabama—trying to live as the polished version of myself, while the small-town girl I’ve always been is still very much alive and well.
But maybe that’s not such a bad place to be. Seeing both sides reminds me that life isn’t about where you live or what kind of town you’re in. It isn’t about the setting or the lifestyle. It’s about the people who fill your days and make a place feel like home. And I’m incredibly lucky to have wonderful friends and family in both places.
Still, underneath the sunshine and the golf carts, I’ll probably always be more Vandergrift at heart. I can enjoy a fancy tapas tasting as much as anyone, but I’ll always prefer a basket of chicken wings from a bar or a Friday night fish fry at the firehall. And that’s okay. We’re all a little better off when we stay true to who we are.
Read more about visits to my hometown and making peace with my past:
Growing Older Means Saying Good Riddance To Your Inner Child (Good Thing Because She Was Annoying)
Christmas As An Adult - A Holiday Time Travel Wish
Favorite Products:
I stumbled across this book by accident and HAD to order it. It’s fun seeing the familiar places from my childhood frozen in time, long before I ever knew them.
Two of my favorite things - chicken wings and my air fryer. Put them together, and you have magic.
This Tory Burch purse isn’t as pricey as some purses, but for me, the girl who usually buys her purses from Old Navy, it was a splurge, and I don’t regret it one bit. I love love love this purse!