The Best Advice You’ll Hear At Any Age

Get comfortable being disliked.

I know, I know…it sounds impossible, but after years of chatting with therapists, hours of introspection, and a ton of journaling, I can tell you that once you set your mind to it and embrace this truth, you’re going to feel like you unlocked a freaking hidden superpower. 

You’re…not…buying that? Let me put it another way:

Letting go of the need for others' approval is the first step toward living life on your own terms.

Is it easy? No. Is it worth working for? Absolutely YES!

Many of us - myself included, because for a large portion of my life I’ve been naive AND a doormat - find ourselves caught in the exhausting trap of worrying too much about what other people think. We transform ourselves to fit into someone else’s comfort zone, or we water down our personalities, overexplain our boundaries, and second-guess our joy just to maintain someone else’s peace, just so we won’t be disliked.

But, is being disliked really that awful? Consider these four truths:

1. If you set a boundary and someone walks away, that’s good. It means the boundary did its job and revealed a conditional relationship that couldn’t survive your growth. Let it go because you’re better off without it.

2. If something wonderful happens in your life and your people aren’t happy for you, find new people. Your wins should be celebrated, not seen as a threat. True friends make a point to clap when you rise.

3. If you can learn to be happy alone, you’ll never feel stuck with people you don’t like. Your time, energy, and peace should be cherished. Stop spending it on people who drain you just because you're afraid of being alone.

4.  99% of people’s judgments have nothing to do with you, and everything to do with them. Their criticism is usually a projection of their own insecurities, fears, or frustrations. If you wouldn’t go to someone for advice, why would you give their opinion of you prime real estate in your head?

Contentment, freedom, and true happiness begin the moment you stop auditioning for everyone else’s approval. When you stop chasing validation and start choosing authenticity, your life will shift in the most unexpected and beautiful ways. You might be shocked at the peace you feel when you stop carrying around other people’s baggage.

So stop shrinking yourself to fit into boxes you were never meant to occupy, stop apologizing for being too loud, too soft, too ambitious, too sensitive—too you, and finally, start living like your life actually belongs to you.

Because it does.

Welcome to your IDGAF era. It’s liberating, it’s joyful, and it's going to look good on you. You understand no one’s opinion of you matters, and you’ll no longer dim your light to make others comfortable. Instead, you’ll be a full-on lighthouse, beaming with pride, energy, and peace.

That’s the kind of glow-up no one can take away.

If you’d like to read more on this topic, I highly recommend the book The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck by Mark Manson. My therapist recommended it a few years ago, and it has become my Bible. Highly recommend!

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